I have this new blog and all and obviously I haven’t blogged much, I just don’t feel like it, not one little bit. I’m all out of wack, too much going on all the time and it’s nothing all that fun.
Loosing all my stuff on diary-x, just plain sucked. I feel like I had a few good memories in there and now they are gone.
lame. Enough whining.

I shall blog again, soon. One of these days.

August 23, 1920- March 13, 2006

My Grandpa passed away on Monday March 13th. I will miss him. He lived a long wonderful life.

He had been in the hospital due to health issues and on the day they were going to release him he had a massive stroke. The right side of his body was paralized and he had lost his speech. He wasn’t able to eat on his own. My Dad had called me around 8:30pm on Monday (about 5 days after the stroke) the family had met with the doctor and decided it would be best, as stated in his living will, to unhook the feeding tube from him. I couldn’t imagine him going in such a way, but I knew it wasn’t right for him to go on living with a tube. Very hard decision to make. They removed the tube and around 10:00pm my Grandpa (Paw-Paw) passed away.

He is the first grandparent that I have lost. I never thought it would be so difficult. Lots of family at the funeral. It hit me the hardest when they shut the casket, the entire time with it open it was as if he was there and then when the casket closed, I realized he was gone. I try to make clear to myself that it is hardest on the ones still living. The person that has gone, is no longer in pain and I know this, if only my heart could understand.

I know I will see him again, in my thoughts and in my dreams.
“Do not stand at my grave and weep; I am not there. I do not sleep. I am a thousand winds that blow. I am the diamond’s gilt on snow. I am the sunlight on ripened grain. I am the gentle autumn’s rain. When you awaken in the morning’s hush, I am the swift uplifting rush of quiet birds in circled flight. I am the soft stars that shine at night. Do not stand at my grave and cry; I am not there. I did not die.”

I Love you Paw-Paw, I know you are now in peace.

He will always be with me.

I am back to the blogging world!

yippee!